Oh y’all, I am tired. And when I say tired, I mean beyond tired – exhausted, worn out, on the verge of LOSING my ever loving mind.
My sweet Elliott hasn’t slept well since before Christmas when he had an ear infection. He is in my bed before midnight every night. Jeremy used to try to take him back to bed, but he would end up with a screaming Elliott for HOURS – seriously, 12:30-2:30 at which point he would give up, bring Elliott to me and he would snuggle up and fall asleep. So, now he just brings him straight to me. No sense in him not sleeping too. Elliott will snuggle up to me and sleep until about 4:45 when he wakes up (like clock work) and wants to nurse. Have you ever nursed while pregnant? If not, let me just tell you – it HURTS. So, I put it off as long as I possibly can.
So for the next two hours he is screaming at me while I lay in bed trying to sleep through it. He sits up, he kicks me, he throws his little body onto mine (often giving head butting me in the process). He will sleep for maybe 10-15 minutes and then start up again, the whole time screaming at me, begging me “milt peese”. It breaks my heart, but I just.can’t.do.it.
I am not one for cry it out – that has never been an option. But I have never had a child this headstrong when it comes to refusing sleep.
Last night I complete lost it on my children. I snapped. I was exhausted. I had spent the day working around the house, then when the big kids got home Seth and I worked on his science fair project. I then made dinner, ate, got kids ready for bed and sat down for family prayer. It was after that when I lost it. The kids were messing around (just being kids) and I completely went ballistic on them. I felt awful. I retreated to the computer and “disappeared” for a while. Jeremy put the big kids to bed and then I took Elliott.
I nursed and rocked him for a bit but he didn’t want to sleep for me. So, Jeremy came and rescued me, took him and got him to sleep. I took a hot bath then climbed in bed and was out by 9:30.
It was a rough day, but an even rougher night – because Mr. Stubborn repeated his old pattern.
I can not do this anymore. I can’t do cry it out, but I know there has to be another option. Friends, have you ever been in this situation? How do you get your babies to sleep without you without doing cry it out? HELP me please, I am so tired I can barely function. I am not good to anyone right now and am desperately seeking some answers.